One thing at a time.

I can manage that.
one thing. one step. one breath at a time
I'm going to make a vague list of things that I need to do.
And the once I'm done figuring out what to do about some things i"m going to figure out a game plan for myself.
because I'm now realizing that I need to do things because of ME not EVERYONE ELSE.
Because that's how I've been living for so long it seems. that i need to do everything because of everyone else and what they want, when in reality, i need to do things because of ME.

1. take care of anne frank: I need to deal with the monster in my closet. Whether that be letting people know that she's in there, or kicking her out. I'm not sure how to deal with that one right now. But it's not healthy. Not at all.
2. These Feelings won't go away, they keep knocking me sideways: Ah love. Or Lust. I'm not sure what to call that. Or what i should have been calling it. But there are decisions that I  should have kept as a definite decision. and maybe this is the time in my life where i should just be me myself and i. maybe i need to just be. and not have to answer to anyone. because it's unhealthy what I've been doing.
3. Become  A FUCKING MODEL. AINT NO BITCHES GONNA STOP ME.: I know my language is vulgar. And no i don't speak like that on a regular basis (looks back on all of my blogs.... welll...)But I'm going to start seriously focusing on it. I've held myself back because I was afraid of losing people, but i'm now realizing that i should never hold myself back from my dreams. So I'm not.
4. I'm young. I am. I'm not old. Eighteen is when you start to truly live, So i'm young, really really young. Not even old enough to live. so i'm going to be young and stay young. And be young.

I don'ot know how much of that made any sense.

I just really needed some straight up truth. 

And that's what I got.

and Now i" see the things that i need to change, and over come and just grow from.